Alternative Lyrics to Well Known Songs 11 - SWPL Life

[Pre-amble: This is one in a series of posts which includes an alternative set of lyrics to a well known song.  Each post will also contain a short introduction to the topic at hand, and a brief explanation of the song itself.  A video of the original song will be included so that the reader can listen to the original song while reciting the alternative lyrics at the same time.]

The Song: SWPL Life (based on Park Life by Blur)

We all know SWPL's, we all roll our eyes at SWPLs 'cause they're so predictable: love of foreign cuisine, quaint cinema, clique jargon, one-up-man-ship, et cetera ad nauseum. 

SWPLs are not a new phenomena, they are just a 21st century model of the 'social climber' who've existed since at least Medieval times.  Even Leo Tolstoy in 'War and Peace' written in the mid-1800s records the SWPL mentality in the character of the (minor nobility) Berg's who loved throwing evening soirees, 'just like everybody else in St Petersburg' (emphasis added):

After Boris came a lady with the colonel, then the general himself, then the Rostovs, and the party became unquestionably exactly like all other evening parties. Berg and Vera could not repress their smiles of satisfaction at the sight of all this movement in their drawing room, at the sound of the disconnected talk, the rustling of dresses, and the bowing and scraping. Everything was just as everybody always has it, especially so the general, who admired the apartment, patted Berg on the shoulder, and with parental authority superintended the setting out of the table for boston. The general sat down by Count Ilya Rostov, who was next to himself the most important guest. The old people sat with the old, the young with the young, and the hostess at the tea table, on which stood exactly the same kind of cakes in a silver cake basket as the Panins had at their party. Everything was just as it was everywhere else.

(Source: http://www.americanliterature.com/author/leo-tolstoy/book/war-and-peace/book-six-1808-10-chapter-xx)

SWPLs are predictable, smug, fake, and engage in prolific cultural-recycling.  Cultural recyclers are people who go round and round and round doing the same thing, time after time, eg wearing the same clothes fashions as 20 years ago, singing the same songs as 50 years ago, doing the same activities as 100 years ago.  Alas SWPLs will intellectualise this process by calling themselves post-modern, thus avoiding any negative thoughts that would arise from considering the fact that they are wholly uncreative.  This song is full of those themes, and is thus dedicated to them!

Follow the link to the song by the well-known Brit-Pop era song, sing along in your head or out loud if so inclined

# SWPL Life #

Oi!

Pretense is a preference for the social-climbers of what is known as..

{SWPL Life}

One up-man-ship cannot be avoided if you want to live a life of what is known as..

{SWPL Life}

Zac's an Anti-Fascist member, he gets intimidated by the White Nationalists, they love a bit of it.

{SWPL Life}

Who's that herb-ette marching?  You should cut down on your fem-life mate, be more masculine!

All the SWPLs.

So many SWPLs.

And they all go round and round.

Round and round.

Through their SWPL life.

{Know what I mean}.

They get up when they're told, except on Bank Holidays when they are truely grateful for the lay-in.

They put their scarves on, have their latte's and dream about 'life in Tuscany'.

They feed the niggers, they sometimes feed the yellows too, it gives them a sense of enormous superiority.

And then they're smug for the rest of the day; safe in the knowledge that there will never be a bit of their heart devoted to anything.

All the SWPLs.

So many SWPLs.

And they all go round and round.

Round and round.

Through their SWPL life.

SWPL Life, {SWPL Life}

SWPL Life, {SWPL Life}

It's got nothing to do with your creative-forward-moving life you know,

It's all about your cultural-recyclers who go round and round and round.

SWPL Life {SWPL Life}

All the SWPLs.

So many SWPLs.

And they all go round and round.

Round and round.

Through their SWPL life.

All the SWPLs.

So many SWPLs.

And they all go round and round.

Round and round.

Through their SWPL life.

[End of Lyrics]